The ‘lympics are running at the moment, guys, and they have been totally radical thus far. Did you know that they’re all being held in Beijing and all this year? I checked on Wikipedia, bros, and that’s in China. Heh, like with those plates that you get from the shop and stuff! That’s priceless, man, I’m telling that joke to my friend Tandy, he works at Netto. I needed to get on the blog and blog about this stuff, because it is seriously mental, and I don’t know how to describe it.
It’s like all these different sports going on at the same time that every country in the world takes part in. Imagine that! Every country does each different race, and they all get medals at the end. I dunno what they get for getting the most medals, but I bet it’s probably some kind of military stuff. Can you imagine if they gave out free weapons to whoever wins the ‘lympics? That’d be off the chain!
I am so totally Xcited about tonight. All the sports are put on really late, and there’s no reason for it, but at like three every morning the games all start and the people do their competitions and all that. I like some more than others – beach volleyball, bro! You can totally see their abs in that. I love a girl with abs. Totally more worthwhile than a girl who ain’t got any of them, am I right?
Tonight though man, I’m totally most excited about the men’s individual gymnastic all-round event. It’s gonna be a dazzling display of physical ability and dexterity, topped off with some fabulous and divine routines that will remind all but the most near-sighted of readers of Stravinsky’s finest pieces. Radical! So bros, this is what I’m recommending to y’all today, alright? Get your ass down to your TV and get it on, score you some awesome acrobatic action! But yo, guys, if you wait up for really late in the afternoon – Gabby Logan, bro! I know you wanna hit that. She’s so fine… I think she’s just damn fine. I got nothin’!
So that gymnastic final - Damn, bro!