Saturday 12 January 2008

Five Beatles Songs That Make No Sense

2: Lady Madonna

What ‘They’ Say The Song Is About

Religion, prostitution, motherhood... a criticism of Catholicism's stance against birth control... Take your pick. One person even dares to suggest the song about Jesus’s mum, but is quickly put in his place. Serves him right.


The Song, Then

The idea that the song would be about mothers seems quite simple, until you realise that the song itself has no coherence at all.
“Friday night arrives without a suitcase”, anyone?
“Sunday morning creeping like a nun”?
These are sentences which make no sense, people. Friday night arriving without a suitcase is a strange idea, because it implies that Friday night can actively carry things, which of course, it cannot, being a time and not a physical…thing. If it could, is Paul suggesting that Friday would be poor and unable to afford a suitcase? Frankly, this line is unwieldy. Moving on, and comparing Sundays to a nun is all well and good, but a creeping one? I cannot remember the last time I saw a nun do any good, honest creeping, I really cannot. There just isn’t a situation that would require a nun to do any creeping. They walk with a saintly grace, Paul McCartney, and you know it!
Paul then wonders how Madonna will feed the rest of her children now she has one at her breast (quick point; this is almost certainly the Madonna from the bible, not the anglophile adoptathon singer-lady. That’d be strange). This indicates that Paul is unaware as to the breast-feeding process. After one baby has been fed, you see, she could feed another one. It’s not like only one baby can be fed a day. Honestly, Paul! One last thing; he repeatedly tells us to “see how they run!” – the babies? They’re still being breast-fed, how can they run? The only thing that can be learnt from this song is that Paul McCartney has no idea what a baby is or how they work.
Then again, singers never were very good with babies (why HELLO, Mr Jackson!) I’m talking about Mr Jackson who lives opposite me obviously; I would not dare to mock the skin-diseased former childstar you thought I was referring to. I’d be sued within an inch of my life..

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