Wednesday, 1 October 2008

The Ten Most Ill-Advised TV Couples, Part 2

3: "Spuffy" – Spike and Buffy, Buffy The Vampire Slayer

The worry about setting up Spike and Buffy in season six of the show was that it would surely have tired out both characters. Spike at this point was completely neutered as a villain, a vampire who couldn’t hurt anyone and who was mostly played for laughs instead of shocks, and Buffy was… well, she was almost always one of the weakest links in her own show. We’re not interested in any of the thoughts that the two characters shouldn’t be put together, because obviously it should never have happened. It’s the aftermath we find most interesting, easily. By putting Buffy with Spike, we effectively lost the ability to see new characters on the show. Once these two came together, it made the show far too interconnected and stopped any new characters (hello, Kennedy) from seeming like credible additions to the cast. It felt like from now on, we were never going to get anything new that last, because the show was intent on mixing it up with all the characters it had left. Even now, as the ‘show’ changes format and becomes a comic-book, we’re looking at a possible romance forming between Buffy’s friend Xander and her sister Dawn because NO. NEW. CHARACTERS. ALLOWED. As soon as Buffy and Spike made out, the show lost it’s fizz, and it fell apart slowly. A such, a lot of fans pretend the show ended back in series 5, two series before it truly closed, simply to keep out the poor stories that came at the end of the show. The moral would seem to be that kissing the undead is bad. (And how did they even have sex, anyway? Doesn’t a vampire have no blood flow? Wouldn’t sleeping with what is essentially a corpse be freakin’ cold? Why won’t you answer the questions that matter, Joss Whedon?)

4: "Drose" – The Doctor and Rose, Dr Who

Something we are seeing with stunning regularity on Doctor Who is that no women seem able to resist The Doctor. He’s had what, four assistants, and of them only one (the best one, Donna) hasn’t fallen for him. None of them fell for him more then Rose, played with an increasing stalkerish desperation by Billie Piper. The show never really put the two of them together as a couple, although it was obvious for everyone watching that the two of them fancied each other, especially once Christopher Ecclestone died and David Tennant turned up. At that point the pairing seemed like an inevitability. In a rare wise move, Russell T Davies decided at this point to send Rose to a parallel universe she could never return from, and we all breathed a sign of relief because at this point she was incredibly irritating and her presence meant David Tennant couldn’t do that wacky eye thing he does as often. And the British public demand Tennant eyes. We thought we were safe.

Until, that is, Rose broke down the walls of her world with the express purpose of seeing the Doctor again. She broke down the boundaries of reality! That’s mad. The Doctor by this point had seen the error of his ways thanks to the general awesome that was Donna, and he managed to return his disturbed stalker to her parallel world, sealing her back in with a clone of himself to make sure she never bothered him, or us, again. So hopefully that will be the last of that.


  1. Oh c'mon! You KNOW Donna wanted him. If anything, she wasn't so damn obvious about it. Because, that's the awesome of Donna: not wearing every emotion on her sleeve (Rose), not turning into a lame character upon her return ( Martha), and most importantly...she was never bovvered. Oh Donna Noble, I miss you already.

  2. Oh, and I forgot to mention, she made a good conscience for the Doctor, complementing his personality instead of merely going "gaga" over him and following whatever he did.

  3. Spike and Buffy should never have got together for so many reasons you could blog about them until the heat death of the universe. Everyone knows the only reason they did hook up was because Marti Noxon had a massive thing for James Marsters. I have no actual way of knowing that but it's my theory and its a good one. Joss was off doing Firefly, Marti liked Spike without his shirt on, so they hooked up.