Monday, 28 April 2008

Five Blue Peter Presenters You Wouldn’t Want To Live With

Everyone watches Blue Peter when they are a child. You can’t deny, there’s a fun to be had in watching people who are much better at everything than you are do things in a style which is much better than you could ever muster. The Blue Peter presenters are strong, muscular people, equipped with a sharp mind and the ability to make anything look interesting. The producers choose people who they think kids will like most, which means really that the line-up of Blue Peter presenters should made up of people who’d make great flatmates. Yet… in honesty, who would want to live with such perfection? Here are the five Blue Peter presenters I would least like to live with.


1: John Leslie

Tell Me More?
John Leslie is a very tall Scotsman who presenter the show from 1989-1994, thus just catching me as I joined the ranks of kids who watched Blue Peter. He, obviously, did mostly physical stuff like training for sports and didn’t spend much time making Christmas Cards – there was more manly stuff afoot.

Why It’d Be Hell:
He’s a sexual dynamo. Not only has he dated Catherine Zeta-Jones pre-fame, he also dated Abi Titmuss pre-fame, and rumours still circle round BBC centre to this day about scandals centred around him, including one particular scenario which featured him with two young ladies at the same time in a travel lodge. If you had him as a room-mate, he’d steal your girlfriend in a second, and then move on to your sisters, mother, any females who were nearby. Not only would this be incredibly awkward, but it would also mean you wouldn’t be able to pull any girls for yourself. The moment a girl shows interest in you, Leslie would doubtless be round in a minute to whisk her off to his place.


2: Anthea Turner

Tell Me More?
The ice-queen of Blue Peter, Turner presented from 1992-1994, and got her own dog in the process. She was the owner of Bonnie, who was amazing. Turner was very good at the presenting biz, and established a decent rapport with her co-presenters, and especially Tim Vincent.

Why It’d Be Hell:
She’s obsessed with cleaning. After Blue Peter she went on to a new career as a cleaning advice lady who goes round to where other people live so she can tell them how messy their homes are. She then goes round with tips and blindingly obvious advice, and eventually they clean up their act. This is just an extension of Turner’s real-life personality, where she keeps a suspiciously clean household at all times. If you were to live with Anthea Turner, you’d have to clean out the sink every day, even if there is nothing in there. Every day would be filled with cleaning and tidying of some kind – and you can’t tell her off, because she just won’t listen. When Anthea Turner wants to do something, she’ll do it. Can’t stop her. She’s the Ice Queen.


3: Matt Baker

Tell Me More?
Matt Baker is seen as one of the very best Blue Peter presenters, being something of an all-rounder during his time with the show from 1999-2006. He could present, do physical stuff (he passed the recruitment for the Royal Marines, no less), had a sense of humour which often resulted in him dressing up as a woman… He could do most anything. He also had a dog, this one called Meg, who was a recurring presence on the show. He’s a top bloke, in other words.

Why It’d Be Hell:
He’s an animal fanatic. Meg is just the tipping point for a man who was born and raised on a farm. Most of his work now consists of animal programmes, including the coverage for Crufts, during which he shows an astounding and petrifying amount of knowledge, almost as much as that of the experts who join him from time to time. Do you remember the scene from Ace Ventura where animals run in from everywhere to join him in his hotel room? Living with Matt Baker would be similar to this.


4: Yvette Fielding

Tell Me More?
The youngest person to ever become a Blue Peter presenter, Yvette Fielding served as part of the team from 1987-1992, so I never saw her myself. I’m told she was alright as a presenter, and during her time she announced she had some kind of skin disease, and got given an award in support. Which is odd, but hey – that’s Blue Peter.

Why It’d Be Hell:
She fanatically believes in ghosts. She presents Most Haunted at the moment, a show based around the premise that he co-presenter Derek Acorah can actually see ghosts and talk to them. Every single episode sees them explore an old house or hospital, and then Derek will promptly get possessed and talk in a stupid voice while Fielding acts terrified. Episode after episode is like this. Nothing ever changes. You’d think that by now she’d give up on him as an idiot, yet she continues to be scared every time he starts talking in that squeaky accents that means a ghost has entered him. Just imagine having that as a room-mate. Yikes. Every time the lights go off, she’d be running round in circles proclaiming the return of Lucifer, and it’s very hard to live with someone who is like that, trust me.


5: Liz Barker

Tell Me More?
Liz Barker appeared on the show from 2000-2006, and played the role of big sister to Konnie Huq’s naughty schoolgirl (wow, that just brought up a fantastic mental image for me). She did a lot of travel reports, moving to Vietnam, Morocco, India and Brazil, amongst others, as well as a variety of other things such as lawnmower racing and joining the circus.

Why It’d Be Hell:
For some reason I think that Liz Barker may actually be a massive bitch. I have no proof for this.

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